I've been venturing out the past week running errands and such.

Normally I'm a real smiley type of girl. I make eye contact with people and maybe sometimes a slight conversation; especially the cash register clerk.

Lately, I've just been trying to get in and out of the store with little to no eye contact.

It's embarrassing to try to speak to someone with my mouth wired shut.

It's awkward.

Try returning something.

Try add matching.

Yeah. I did both of those.

You know they were judging me in their heads. I felt it.

I felt it so much that at Costco I felt the need to tell the lady about my surgery and then I began apologizing. It was weird.

She then asked me a bazillion questions and couldn't believe it. Then, I left.



Then today at the park a sweet grandma was trying to talk to me. She talked about the weather. Her grand kids. The neighborhood park. I was short and to the point.

I had a pit in my stomach.

I felt rude.

That's not who I am.

But I didn't want to sit there and tell her my long, drawn out story.

I didn't want someones grandmas sympathy.

So I just followed my twins around and stayed as far as I could from her.





I'm ready to be back to normal. I really am.